• Jill Hinckley

Use These 5 tips to Stay Calm, Cool & Charming on a Date.

Here’s the reality: according to’s Singles In America Survey, 89 percent of singles get nervous before a first date. If the numbers stick - you’re probably part of that group! It’s completely natural and expected to experience some jitters before jumping into a date. It’s a vulnerable place to be in: will they like me? Will something awkward happen? Will I spill my drink into my lap?!

All in all, dating is just a step in forming the trusting, emotion-filled and meaningful partnerships all of us crave. Our main goal is for you to be confident and feel yourself. Here are some of our favorite tips for keeping you that way.

1. Create A Support System

This is your impromptu cheer squad that wants nothing more than for you to be happy. They are your children, your best friends, co-workers - whoever that special someone is who you know has your best interest in mind. Sometimes half the battle of dealing with the jitters is just taking them on yourself. It may just be that you need to talk it through with a friend to release the pressure valve on that energy.

Plus, in all likelihood, they will be able to offer you words of advice from their own experiences - and eventually, those worries will feel small. If you don’t have a reliable group you feel you can trust, call on us - we’re happy to be a sounding board!

2. Shake It Off!

Remember that thing we said earlier about “releasing the pressure valve”? Movement can do the same thing for you. Take a brisk walk, do a fun dance (we recommend putting on your favorite tunes for this) or go to the gym before your date. Again, frenetic energy can get trapped in the body and make you think you feel worse than you actually do. Incorporating movement into your pre-date routine may be a great way to go.

3. Keep Things Light

Picture this: you haven’t met your date before. She goes in for the handshake, you go in for the cheek kiss. Cue the fumbling arms and awkwardness. Is it better to clam up, and guzzle down a glass of wine? Or, could you instead laugh it off with a witty comment? The fact is we’re all human, and awkwardness is bound to happen every once in a while. Do your best to keep it light and things will flow more smoothly.

4. Define Your Purpose

What is it that you want to get out of TODAY or TONIGHT? Of course your end goal might be to find a relationship, but when you break it down to more manageable desires it can take some of the pressure off. For example, “I hope to enjoy a great meal with someone whose company I enjoy”. Perhaps it is, “I hope to learn something new about someone I may be compatible with”. Challenge yourself to create interesting conversation and hopefully kindle a new friendship.

5. Take a Breath

We know - you’ve heard this one before. But truly, taking deep, calm breaths is a great way to help you relax. Download a favorite meditation before you go out on a date, or simply sit there and breathe. Best of all, it costs absolutely nothing to do and it works in lots of different situations.

At the end of the day, just be yourself and have fun; the rest will come naturally.

What are your favorite tips for breaking the pre-date jitters? Email us and let us know!